By Matt McDonough
Welcome to the second edition of “The Town Crier.”
Rumor has it that Amazon founder and one of the richest humans in the world, Jeff Bezos, is interested in buying the reigning world champion Boston Celtics, according to Bill Simmons. Wyc Grousbeck, governor and co-owner of the Celtics, surprisingly announced they were for sale shortly after their 18th title. Co-owner Steve Pagliuca and others in the ownership group will be part of the bidding process, but the Grousbeck family will relinquish their shares fully by 2028. The value and asking price seems to be hovering around $6 billion, which is pocket change for Bezos. And after flirting with the Washington Commanders, maybe he pushes even harder for the Celtics.
The town crier, like most readers, daydreams of endless wealth. And aside from buying a lifetime supply of megaphones, soapboxes, and tissues, the crier’s first major purchase would be a favorite sports team. Hate him or love him, New York Mets’ owner Steve Cohen bought his favorite team and is looking to become a World Series champion (eventually). Having Bezos as an owner, despite what one may think of him as a man (and the crier will keep those thoughts on hold for now), means constant competitiveness and a blank checkbook. The second apron of the luxury tax thanks to this new CBA, which the crier wishes they had an economics degree to fully understand the nuances of it all, would be no issue for Bezos. So the Celtics would surely be able to pay top dollar to retain and attract players as long as Bezos wishes.
A con would be the Celtics arena situation. The Bruins own the T.D. Garden. The Celtics have always been tenants, which is why initially home games would sometimes be played in Providence and other locales (the early NBA had some “home” games pretty much anywhere they could make a buck including many double-headers at Madison Square Garden to get a good gate). The Celtics also famously played a few home games every season at the Hartford Civic Center from 1975-1995 while still playing at the old Boston Garden. The Celtics’ lease at this Garden currently runs until 2036.
It’s not outlandish to see Bezos going the way of Clippers’ owner Steve Ballmer and putting his own stamp on the franchise with a new arena. One assumption is it would be a Celtics-centric arena with additional amenities for entertainment, restaurants, retail, and who knows- maybe even office or living space. As nice as a Patriot Place-esque venue with a team museum attached and additional public space sounds, it’s impossible to imagine that something of that nature could be accomplished in Boston proper, especially, and perhaps most importantly, across the street from Sullivan’s Tap. That land would most likely be acquired beyond the city limits, maybe on the waterfront similar to Encore Boston Harbor in Everett.
Even if the benefit was there for the franchise having its own home, a move would be bittersweet for fans. The Boston Celtics are Boston. It would be a tough pill to swallow seeing the Celtics move from the site of both Gardens on Causeway Street. At least until a banner was raised in the next Garden.
- The Connecticut Sun played a home game in front of a raucous sell out crowd at TD Garden in Boston on Tuesday. Not only did they beat the Sparks on the court, 69-61, but the night at the Celtics’ home was big for the Sun franchise in the stands. It was the biggest crowd Connecticut has ever played before.
The Sun, with the support of the Mohegan tribe and strong women’s basketball fanbase in the state, have a home in Connecticut. But a rumor circulated earlier this year that the current Celtics ownership would be interested in bringing a WNBA team to Boston. Former U.S. women’s soccer player and wife of current Celtic star Jrue Holiday, Lauren Holiday, echoed that sentiment on the NBC Sports Boston telecast Tuesday night. Even Sun head coach Stephanie White said so in her post game press conference.
It’s far-fetched right now, considering the Sun being New England’s team and having some sort of partnership with the Celtics in recent years, but the rumor suggested Grousbeck already had a team name in mind: the Boston Charm. With the history of witchcraft throughout New England, especially in nearby Salem, Mass., this does fit. However, the name best suited for a hypothetical WNBA team in Boston is the Banshees.
The Boston Banshees would be by far the best name in the league and one of the best in sports. It aligns with the Celtics perfectly. Stemming from Irish folklore, a banshee is a female spirit that forewarns others of impending death with a shrill cry. For a women’s sports team in Boston, what’s better than that?
- As if the return of the EA Sports NCAA Football video game last month didn’t inject nostalgia enough, Backyard Sports announced on Tuesday that the video game series of our childhoods is officially returning.
- Noah Lyles’ schtick is growing older by the day.
- The Maui Invitational schedule was announced this week. UConn, the two-time reigning champions, play Memphis on Nov. 25 at 2:30 p.m. The following day, the Huskies will play Michigan State or Colorado. The Buffaloes just had three players taken in June’s NBA Draft, tying them with Kentucky. UConn bested both of the aforementioned schools with four players picked.
- This column’s thread of the week comes from Wolf of X. It features maps of the earth and seeing the world in a whole new way. Highlights include peaks of the largest land empires in world history, a map showing the movement of the front lines of the Korean War, China’s population distribution, Europe in 1444, and the world according to fish.
- Best of luck to Zion Williamson on his weight loss goal. If he reaches it, please pass some pointers to the crier.
- Two things to try: Yasso greek yogurt bars (pistachio brittle and black raspberry chip flavors) and making mini sandwiches out of fried pickle appetizers and putting the aioli inside.
- Some may say Labor Day, others may say the start of football season, but the conclusion of the Little League World Series marks the unofficial end of summer.
